Tuesday, June 10, 2008

The Two Types



I Think He Is Pro-Active, I'd Give Him A Buck


I don't know how many times I have related these axioms to my family and friends, so I thought it was time to write them down. Once I am dead and gone, I won't be able to pass them on, so hopefully the internet will let them live on indefinitely. (yeah, right)

Despite all the schooling and learning I have done throughout my life there have been some key concepts that all my instructors have left out. These are the concepts that I had to learn for myself. I suppose we all do. Writing them down just doesn’t have the same impact.

"There Are Two Types Of People In This World". How many times have we heard this in some form or another?

I was almost in my 30s before this concept started to sink in. The concept is figuring out the two types of people and learning how to spot them. Because let's face it, people are sneaky. They don't want you to know what type they are. It would give you an advantage and that just isn't fare.

The classic 'type' test, is the old psychologist question, "Is the glass filled half way to the top, Half Empty or Half Full?" Based on your answer, your personality could be categorized as either optimistic (half full) or pessimistic (half empty). While we can't ask everyone we meet this question, we can learn to be more observant of those around us and look for the clues.

Here are some of the 'categories' that I have come up with over the years to define the "Two Types" of people:

Positive People / Negative People:
Positive people tend to be happy and independent. Negative people tend to do a lot of complaining and also tend to seek out each other and find comfort in each other's misery.

Proactive People / Inactive People:
Proactive folks tend to be problem solvers and thinkers. Inactive folks tend to expect others to do things for them and usually come across as being somewhat 'needy'.

Optimistic People / Pessimistic People:
Optimists are usually looking forward to the possibilities that a new day or a new challenge brings. Pessimists usually look backward at the negatives and project them into the future. An Optimist looks at the sunrise and thinks what a beautiful day! The Pessimist remembers that yesterday sucked, and so will today.

Conscientious People / Inconsiderate People:
Conscientious folks tend to be aware of their surroundings and their environment and understand the impact they have on it. Inconsiderate people see the world as theirs and do whatever they want. They do not see the relationship that there actions (or inactions) have on others.

Questioning People / Habit People:
These are folks that look for a better ways to do things and question what they are told. Then there are the people who do things repetitively and never question why or how they do what they do. The Questioners want to design the grand scheme and solve the problems, the Habit People want to work on the assembly line.

Open People / Repressed People:
Open people admit their flaws and misgivings and try to come to terms with them on an ongoing basis. Repressed people tend to be in denial about what has happened to them which often manifests extreme behavior such as depression, alcoholism and abuse.

This can best be summed up by a co-worker I once had. Every day she would come to work and for the first 2 hours she would go from office to office complaining about what an awful place it was to work in. Then at 10am, she would take her cigarette break, go to the bathroom and then go shopping for 2 hours and have lunch. At 2pm, she returned to the office to answer a few phone calls and then go home.

I eventually learned that the opposite of her behavior was to try and find some 'little' thing in the office that I could do better every day. The concept being, that after a few months my job would be better and more enjoyable. I was right. My job got better and I got promoted. The ex-coworker is on her 5th job since then and she is still complaining.

So the next time you get a new neighbor or they hire someone new at your office, apply the following questions to them after a few weeks. Based on your answers you will know if you should avoid them or not.

Positive / Proactive / Optimistic / Conscientious
/ Questioning and Open

vs

Negative / Inactive / Pessimistic / Inconsiderate / Habitual / Repressed

8 comments:

  1. I believe that we make our own luck.

    That life gives back to you what you put into it.

    And when I get "down" I try to remember that if nothing changes......well........nothing changes.

    I have very little tolerance for "yucky" people.

    I try to live by these truths each day. But I am human so I fall and bust my butt sometimes. It is my choice to get up and brush it all off or lay there and whine about the dirt on my knees.

    One day at a time......as they say.

    Great post!

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  2. Good post. I can see most co-workers fitting into a lot of these classes. And we also have the complainer/job avoider-at-all-costs at our work too.

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  3. Liquid....the older we get, the less tolerance we all have for Yucky People.

    Maureen....we all have them, it is God's way of testing us, and the exam ain't easy.

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  4. Negative people and moods will drain your energy and drag you down. Appreciate the positive, work on the negative and it all balances.

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  5. i used to have a friend who was annoyingly negative. i felt bad for her, but even more for me cause she wouldn't get the hint that i didn't want to be her friend anymore! i started ditching her until she FINALLY got the hint, i don't think that must've helped w/ her "negative" view on things lol but whatever, i want to be surrounded by happy people!

    i think there's another type of person, the one who worries a lot, that's annoying too. all the "what if"s in the world, yeah, they know all of them by heart.

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  6. @noelia one of my roommates is like that, she likes to go over all her what-ifs and would've-beens... i used to listen to her out of politeness and because she listened to me too when i needed someone to talk to, but after a while i realized i was just supporting her habit of living in the past. she's a friendly and kind person, but when she starts talking about the same old regrets i just say no and walk away. it's not worth it to keep stoking the embers of a dead fire.

    @lotus great post! i'll keep your advice in mind and check out the personality types wherever i go :)

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  7. I avoid the negative people. They take too much energy from me, even when they're just standing.

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  8. Terrific post...this is exactly what makes life interesting, I believe. I dont care how many obstacles I have encountered, frogs I have kissed, or black clouds that drift overhead, I see the glass as half full! What is curious is "why" one is one way and someone in the same family is the other...hmmmmm? Thanks for sharing!

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