Locker Room

Let me give you women a peek into a place you never go. The men's locker room at the YMCA. I go to the 'Y' to relax. I work out, take long showers and sit in the steam room with my thoughts. This is the place where I am alone with all the memories and collected wisdom of my life. It is a place where I think and ponder, where I ask myself questions. However, I often seem alone in this endeavor. Because much to my surprise, my fellow men don't share this mindset. Most of the other male members of the 'Y' are downtown professionals, such as lawyers, judges, managers and the like. Yet, their conversations in the locker room are anything but deep or thought provoking. Most of what I hear is sports talk about recent games, stories about court cases (In my last case I had a juror that was soo fat....) or puns about fellow members abilities or sexual prowess. In essence, it is the high school locker room populated by 55 year old men. As I search for the meaning of life in the swirling clouds of the steam room, I realize just how out of place I am when another member asks his racquetball buddy, "Did you fart?"

Politically Incorrect?

During the course of my employment I get to deal with individuals that have large families that are enrolled in state sponsored services. I have been trained in cultural diversity as a result of having to deal with these individuals. What might be considered a normal family environment for a Caucasian family of 2.5 children is going to be totally different than an Hispanic family of 8.2 children. I get that. What I don't get is the naming conventions that some minorities have regarding their brood. What does it tell you when the names of the children in a family are as follows; Tonisha, Taniqua, Tonosha, Tiquain, Toeneal, Tanque, Timaul? It tells me that the parents (usually the mother) think this is cute, and that they are completing a set or collection of children. The children probably don't really care, because they are individuals, but anyone having to deal with this family as a group is just going to roll their eyes and think to themselves, "Not again.". Then there are the families that name all their children after automobiles...I am just saying, there should be a law against giving out bizarre names to children.

My Space ! ! !

Not the social network site. The area around me. It is a crowded world where I live, but most folks don't seem to understand this. When I am out training my dog to fetch, how often does some moron decide to walk their little poodle right past me, distracting my dog? When I return to my parked car, how often does the idiot who parked next to me leave 2 feet between the vehicles? when I am walking through a crowded grocery store, how many people really have stop right in front of me to check a list or answer their cell phone? Do you really have to cit-chat with the cashier when there are 10 people waiting in line behind you to check out? This may all seem pretty trivial, until you find it happening to you 20 times a day. The allure of the metropolitan lifestyle has definitely lost its luster.